When the mom goes to the fridge for carrots

By: 
Lisa Ingebrand, LRnews@frontiernet.net

I went to the refrigerator to grab the carrots, but I found a stew of stinky old, rotten vegetable goo in the bottom of the crisper drawer.

After emptying the drawer, discarding the bad produce, and washing the good veggies, I opened the under-the-sink cabinet to grab the cleaner to clean the drawer.

I found the cleaner sitting in a puddle of water, so I had to take everything out of the under-the-sink cabinet so I could wipe it dry and look for the leak.

When I opened the towel drawer to get the towels to dry the under-the-sink cabinet, I found the drawer empty, so I went upstairs to the laundry room to find clean towels.

A mountain of clean laundry awaited me, so I sat down and started folding and sorting in an effort to find the drying towels. When everything was in neat, folded piles, I made my way into my younger daughter’s room to put a $1 bill that I found in a pocket of her shorts while doing the laundry back in her purse.

Walking into my child’s room, I stepped on a wet towel. That wet towel led me down the hall and to the laundry room where I found cat puke on the floor.

To clean up the cat puke, I went to the linen closet to dig out some old rags. Upon opening the closet doors, a wave of sleeping bags, swimming gear, and towels rained down on me.

So, I sat down and started sorting through the disaster. Amongst the mess was a long pink ribbon that I tossed aside, planning to later transport it to the basement craft bin.

That ribbon was soon devoured by our large orange cat, who obsessively consumes things like tape, ribbon, and strings if they are not put away.

I managed to grab a piece of the ribbon before it all went into kitty’s mouth and slowly and gently pulled it back up. The cat was fine, but the ribbon went in the trash can.

The trash can was full, so I hauled it to the garage to empty it.

On the way to the garage, I heard the doorbell ring and went to greet the visitor.

The visitor was a pest-exterminator who wanted to delete every insect and small rodent from my property. I told him no (repeatedly) and he left, but upon seeing my mailbox, I walked to get the mail.

Both the mail and the trash can were in my hands when my husband pulled in the driveway and greeted me.

I dumped the trash, and John and I walked into the house together, making small talk. We chatted about what we had done that day and our plans for dinner that night.

Then, upon entering the kitchen, I remembered the stinky mess in the refrigerator drawer and the puddle under the sink.

John and I both went upstairs to grab towels and encountered a half-emptied linen closet and cat puke on the laundry room floor.

And, at that moment, I remembered why I had reached for the carrots in the first place... We were having friends over for dinner and I was going to serve carrots as a side.

We went out to eat.

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